


moonlight through the window

by yourmorningstar



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Im bad at writing, M/M, Seo Changbin is Whipped, chan is just sleeping, changbin has insomnia, changbin is cute, changlix, felix is cute, gyu is gone, i love my bbys changlix, i love stray kids, im bad at tagging, im bad at titles, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-16
Packaged: 2019-06-28 01:31:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15697410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourmorningstar/pseuds/yourmorningstar
Summary: In which, Gyu is replaced with Felix





	moonlight through the window

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! this is the first fic im posting, pls excuse like everything. im bad at writing and english isnt my first language im sorry but i loved this idea ever since i thought of it so i had to write it. 
> 
> i have a twitter if yall want to see my tweets screaming abt stray kids [@orbitsneo](https://twitter.com/skzctech?s=09)

**_2:00 PM__ **

"Chan-hyung, are you awake?" Changbin asks his teammate who's on the other side of their shared room that was enveloped by shadows.

All he gets in reply is a sloven, loud snore from his roommate, at least that answered the question. Changbin let out a heavy sigh as he shifts to lay down on his side, facing the wall.

It was two in the afternoon last time he checked his cellphone, which was a minute ago. The team woke up at ten in the morning and found out that the power was out, as in the entire building was out of power for the whole day. Since it was their free day and they can't do anything in the dorm without electricity, all nine of them agreed to go back to bed and figure something out when they wake up.

Changbin would've been down with the idea if he hadn't left his favorite plush, Gyu, in the hotel they stayed at in Japan. The only thing that helped him sleep unperturbed through the night, the only inanimate object that he treasured the most, _gone._

_Curse the power outage._

_Curse the hotel where he left Gyu in._

_Curse insomnia._

_Curse himself for not being able to sleep without a damn toy._

At this point, he's frustrated. The bags under his eyes were a scar left by the hundreds of days he laid awake before he got Gyu and today just got added to those hundreds of days. Changbin rolls on his back to look at the white ceiling this time, the wall next to him not pleasing enough. No wall is pleasing enough to stare at for hours.

He traces the nearly unnoticeable cracks on the ceiling with his eyes with the company of Chan's loud snoring on his side of the room. The raven black-haired rapper trails the faint cracks until his gaze reaches the small window beside him, the small, rectangular window illuminated a part of the wall opposite to where it's situated. Using the sunlight from outside, it created a patch of light with the same rectangular shape of the window on the wall above Chan's bed.

The window is relatively small, it's a window that seems to suit a prison cell more than a dormitory but Changbin supposes being and idol is sometimes like being a prisoner, not always, just sometimes. Deep in his random train of thoughts, he raises one arm in front of the window, watching it cast a shadow on the opposite wall where Chan was soundly asleep while clutching a pillow to his chest, how he wishes he could fall asleep as easy as Chan. The moment his head collides with his pillow, he drifts off to dream land. Weird, but it's definitely one of the abilities he could only wish for.

Insomnia was a big part of Changbin's childhood, on weekdays he functioned on two hours of sleep (sometimes one), and his will to stay awake during class, usually though he ended up with his face slammed on the desk, half-dead, and detention. The instance occured almost everyday that his teachers actually called up his parents to inform them about his behavior.

And that's when they bought him the plush that really changed his sleep habits for the better. 

_"Binnie, I have a gift!" his mom says over-enthusiastically as she walks in on Changbin doing homework. Even without a wink of sleep, he tries his best to be a good student._

_The third-grader sets his pen on the table and turns around to face his mom who has a large grin on her face, similar to the way he smiles. Her hands were behind her back, clearly holding something._

_"What is it, mom?" Though he had dark circles around his eyes, his eyes still twinkle with a sense of childish curiosity._

_"Ta-da!" she hands out a plush about the size of his head towards him, the grin never vanishing from her face. With this attitude, you would think she was a child again. "This is Gyu, he promised me that he would help you sleep well!" The plush is of Munchlax, with it's pointy ears and cyan and cream color._

_Changbin stands up and wraps his arms around his mother in a warm hug, squishing the plush in between them. "Thank you, mom."_

_"Anything for my baby."_

Since then, he gained back the sleep he lost, every night didn't turn into a nightmare, every night he slept peacefully, with his arms wrapped around the plush. Changbin even started dreaming, something he never thought he would experience. He will never forget the time he woke up and ran straight to his mom to tell her all about his first dream wherein he saw a freckled blond boy whose smile shone brighter than the sun.

Now Gyu is miles away from him and he's slowly sinking back to those nights he spent twisting and turning. It's his first day without Gyu, his head is already hurting just by imagining the succeeding days, weeks, months, years. Changbin could already feel his eye bags grow heavy from the lack of sleep once again. 

"I hate this." he whispers to no one in particular, focus still nailed on the shadow of his hand. Changbin thinks he's gonna go crazy because of his inability to sleep. 

The male swirls his hand around and dully observes how its shadow mirrors it's movements. Soon enough, he closes his eyes to try and sleep (again) yet not an ounce of drowsiness reached him causing a non-committed _Why did I bother?_ slip up in his mind.

This is ridiculous, daft even, how he could not fall asleep without his toy. All he can do now is stare at Chan as the older slumbers peacefully and with no issues, creepy he knows, but nothing can keep him entertained. 

Changbin tries counting sheep, only to conclude his effort when he unconsciously reached two hundred and is not even close to being asleep. Changbin tries blinking rapidly to tire his eyes, only to result in his eyes being even more active.

This is unfair, insomnia wasn't something he called for when he became an idol, he thought he would never lose Gyu. 

A wave of nostalgia washes over the rapper's fragile body, reminiscing on his trainee days, when 3RACHA was only known by a handful of people, when he rapped in front of small crowds, when he felt over the moon everytime they get booked to perform in bars or cafés. He was carefree back then, not worrying about his image, his diet, his reputation, and the approval of the public. 

Changbin wanted to debut, that was for sure, he wanted to be known for the skills he honed, the lyrics he composed, his personality, and he is now, yet he didn't know of the set of guidelines, and consequences he had to endure.

He's too busy to visit his family, he gets cooped up in the dance studio, he has to watch what he eats, he can't even go to the convenience store without him being bomabarded by camera flashes and murmuring. He's too new, too new for this world, yet he keeps trying because he's succeeding while doing what he loves and that's what matters.

His insomnia helped him in a way, his eloquence was an example, because he stayed up late with nothing more than his blanket and pillows, Changbin had to pass time in some interesting way, so he practiced, he practiced to speak, to enunciate his syllables clearly, carefully rolling words along his tongue until he became comfortable with sounds.

From short words to full blown sentences, he was able to say them quickly but clearly, the listener able to understand every word. The short male was a debate prodigy, people had said. 

Outstanding defences, high quality use of vocabulary, he had a knack for excellent metaphors as well, these skills granted him numerous positions in his school, school council president, leader of the debate team, school paper editor, director of the theater club, he could go on.

Never had he expected that he would use such skills in rapping, after discovering the world of music from an artist performing on television, he couldn't go back, he aspired to be an artist that could appear on TV, to perform just like the idol that he admired. And just like that, he made the right decisions and debuted as an idol.

Wonderful life story.

Until he lost Gyu.

He never prepared for this moment, the day he loses his beloved plushie. Well, here he is. They didn't have sleeping pills in the dorm either, so that sucks.

Changbin freezes, his body going stiff, his door creaks open and the sound of feet shuffling reaches his ears. As fast as he possibly can, he twists his body to face the wall once again. 

His first thought was a robber had managed to enter their dorm and is now looking for valuable things to steal, and he's not about to get into a fight with a potentially dangerous person. Call it cowardly but he would rather get his stuff stolen than his life.

But instead of hearing someone digging through their drawers, he feels the spot on his mattress next to him sink, someone is laying beside him. Changbin's breath hitches in his throat, his heart pumping with adrenaline, he feels sweat start to form on his forhead.

A hand slithers around his waist and it rests there innocuously, the rapper stares at it like it's some sort of snake, he's tempted to turn around and find out who this person is but he decides against it. This person's head snuggles closer to him and he feels their breath against his neck.

Weirdly enough, he feels at ease. Like this hand belonged around his waist, like their head belonged right where it's snuggled up, like this person—whoever they are—belonged exactly where they were. The tension etched into the set of his shoulders drained, relaxing them and his body.

Was it one of his members? If it wasn't a burglar, the only plausible conclusion to come to is that it was one of his members. But who? He's quite sure all eight of them were sound asleep.

Like a bolt of lightning, drowsiness strikes him, weaving through his nerves. His eyes suddenly went droopy, is he drunk? He didn't drink the night before. Why is he suddenly sleepy? Slowly but surely, Changbin's eyes flutter shut and he drifts off to sleep successfully.

**_9:00 PM__ **

Changbin opens his eyes, empathic. He brings up a hand to rub at his eyeballs, adjusting his vision to his surroundings. He was still in his room.

He fell asleep? His regains his senses, looking around once more to confirm that he was definitely in his dorm. It's only now that he feels the hand carding through his hair.

"Slept well?" a deep, husky voice reaches his ears, it sent shivers down his spine, the owner of the voice sounds like he'd just woken up as well. Changbin looks up and stops short, widening his eyes comically in surprise.

"Felix?" his own voice came out as hoarse from not using it for a couple of hours.

Felix remains unperturbed, even smiling at the boy who has an arm wrapped around his waist, Changbin realizes this and tries to pull away but Felix releases the black hair in his grasp and grabs a hold of  his arm and places it back.

"Why are you here?" he mumbles shyly, looking back down at his feet. He was thankful that it was dark enough to hide the flush on his cheeks, he didn't pull away anymore, he leaves his arm there because even he admits that he likes it.

"I couldn't sleep." Felix replies in a matter-of-fact tone like that would explain why he slept next to Changbin.

"So you came into my room?"

"It's also Chan-hyung's room, y'know." Felix corrects, another smile crawls on his lips.

"Fine, _our_ room." 

"You didn't seem to be asleep when I came in either." that causes Changbin to tilt his head back up to look at him with that look of incredulity.

"You knew?"

"Your shoulders were tensed and your body was stiff, you were quite obvious." Felix says, which shocked the other, because of how much his Korean had improved and how he noticed his tensed figure.

This comfortable silence swallows the small room whole, Changbin could feel the rise and fall of the latter male's stomach as he breathes in sync.

"Did I help you sleep?" once again Changbin looks up and locks eyes with Felix, the boy who snuck into his bedroom and laid down beside him like it was nothing, the boy who had arms that reassured him that he wouldn't let go, the boy who did all of that as if he had done it a million times before. 

And at the back of his mind, he hopes he does it a million times more.

Moonlight seeps in through that small window, and somehow, Felix was at the perfect spot for the moonlight to cast a warm glow over his features.

He didn't notice it when he woke up, but now that he's aware and thinking straight, he realizes one thing.

Felix is absolutely _stunning._

The brown in his pupils are more evident under the light, twinkling even, his freckles pop out and Changbin thinks it's a constellation not even the real ones in the sky could compete with, and were his lips this pink before?

"Hey," his deep voice jars him from his thoughts and drags him back to reality.

Yes, their faces are inches away from each other.

Yes, Changbin thinks Felix is the prettiest boy he has ever laid his eyes on.

Yes, Changbin has the sudden urge to kiss him.

"It's rude to stare, hyung."

"Sorry." Changbin forces his eyes to peel off of Felix and look at anywhere and anything but Felix, because he knows that once he glances back at him, he's never going to be able to stop himself. "Yeah, you did help."

"I'm glad."

"Why are you still here?"

"Do you not want me to be?"

"Yes— I mean, no— I mean—" he stops himself and curls his legs closer to his torso before his words melt like ice cream on a hot day. Still, he keeps his arm fixed around the other's waist.

What happened to Changbin? The rapper who could speak clearly, the rapper who knew his way around words, the debate prodigy?

Felix just chuckles with a smile that seems to outshine the sun. Interesting, a face that shines like the moon with a smile that bears the sun.

"If you didn't notice yet, the electricity is back and the others are watching a movie in the living room." Felix informs him, jerking a thumb to point at the bedroom door. "Should we go and join them?"

Without a moment of hesitation, Changbin shakes his head, his dark hair shuffling with it, falling over his eye. 

"Let's go back go sleep," he says. He lowers his head and shuts his eyes. However, he did not expect the younger to pull him closer, burying his face into the soft cloth of his sweatshirt. Felix holds him tighter, cozier, and follows a gentle carding pattern through his locks. 

"Hyung," he calls out, soft as ever. Well at least the softest his deep voice could get.

Changbin was afraid to meet him in the eye again, but he still does it. He tilts his head up and gazes at the younger. 

"Goodnight, Changbin-hyung." without preamble, Felix cups the other's cheek and kisses him square on the lips, a sweet peck, filled with affection. Chaste and memorable.

The aftereffects reach Changbin soon enough. His heart is galloping, hammering his chest, all his blood seems to have rushed for his cheeks, his palms are suddenly sweaty, his eyes are wider than a goldfish's, and the set of his shoulders are tensing like it was before Felix came.

And Felix? he's smiling, smiling like the lovesick fool he is as Changbin avoids his gaze and buries himself back into his chest like it was his safe place. He doesn't say anything after that, he just diminishes any remaining space left between them and closes his eyes.

That night, they sleep peacefully. Their legs tangled together, and arms around each other. Even with the times Changbin slept with Gyu, he is undeniably certain that this is the night he slept best.


End file.
